Ironman New Zealand 2023
What a bundle of fun that was!
The prep for this race was certainly not ideal. Very minimal long rides and runs, 70.3 2 weeks prior, travel vaccinations on the Monday, and feeling ill and constant headaches since then. These are my excuses, but at the end of the day I didn’t train adequately.
The morning off I woke up feeling ill, I put it down to race nerves. Gathered up all of my swim kit and headed off to transition to finish my prep on my bike. Then down to the swim start to face off to the Haka, which was incredible and got me ‘ready for war’.
The swim start was a mass start, meaning all 1200 odd competitors were sandwiched into a 200m line. Being constantly squeezed up and knowing feet would be flying everywhere I managed to find myself some space. I felt like an anchovy in a tin can, and probably smelt like one too.
BANG the canon fired and I sprung into action swimming straight over the top of 3 people who floated in shock as to the loudness of the canon. I managed to largely stay out of trouble and keep a decent line to the first turn buoy then another 50m or so to the next turn buoy where we started the long stretch before turning to home. This felt great, I seemed very comfortable and was quite happy with sitting on people toes and swimming past them. I felt like free Willy, being released from captivity!
Heart break occurred when we hit the 70.3 turn buoy and realised we had to carry on swimming. At the last turn point there seemed to be a lot of people and the swimming became more of a fist fight. Came out on top after 3 rounds with a pink cap on my left, I pushed for home, turned left and had a 100m dash to the exit. I was particularly pleased with my swim, my fitness swimming wise hadn’t seemed to go anywhere and although not my fastest it wasn’t my worse swim.
Up the hill into transition I got greeted by the wonderful volunteers who handed me my bike bag and then took me into the change tent, sat me down ripped my wet suit off me and pointed me to my bike. I was in and out so quick I hardly knew what had happened. A successful flying mount onto my bike was greeted with a few ‘wows’ from the crowd and a big smile on my face. My plan was to gather speed and then get my feet in my shoes and fly off like a rocket.. but alas! My shoes had other plans. They were not slipping in like they usually do and instead it was like trying to wedge a hamster into a hoover. Not easy let me tell you. After many attempts my feet were in and off I went.
A few people came flying past, they were definitely going too hard… I sat at a comfortable pace and let my heart rate settle a bit. The people who had passed me then came back into sight and I passed them one by one. I then flew down some hills and ended up with 3 of us riding together. At km 75 I realised we where going at a 4hour 45 min bike split pace and I decided to back off knowing I was certainly going too hard.
Flying down the hill back into Taupo I caught a female pro and road with her for a bit but then at 100km the wheels fell off. I ended up getting off my bike for 15 mins to stretch my back out – back pain I have never really experienced before, so this was quite a shock. The pits of hell really had come and surrounded me. Trying to get my leg over the bike to get back on was quite simply excruciating. Once on the next task was to pedal and like a reluctant teenager I got my legs moving, all while muttering under my breath various profanities. The final 55km was probably the hardest and most painful ride I have ever had. I couldn’t hold anything over 100 watts and felt like it was a complete lost cause. But I made it home.
Feeling terrible I slid off my bike and started heading to the racking area surprised to have someone take my bike off me then direct me to the change tent… bemused I ran-walked into the tent got handed my run bag and then had my shoes changed, sunglasses placed on my head and visor handed to me. Christ I thought, does someone want to run for me as well?
Suddenly I broke into a jog and then a run, and I felt pretty damn amazing. I could not believe it. 1km in I had a few pros pass me and I decided to run with Sebastian Kienle to get a cool stride for stride picture. Not sure I got one. This form didn’t last too long and I found myself with no energy and in a large amount of pain.
I ended up catching Roy a guy I had trained with in the South Island and we decided we were getting each other to the end. We ran as much as we could and walked the aid stations, particularly enjoying the ‘Unofficial AidStation’. A swig of beer on the second lap gave me some carbs to keep going.
The third lap came and we were greeted by the paparazzi, shoving cameras in our faces as Roy and I ran stride for stride down the hill. This only means on thing. We must extend our stride incase we get on TV! Luckily the down hill helped our severely aged bodies into what looked more like a race instead of a desperate sprint to the next aid station. Then like an oasis in the distance the ‘Unofficial AidStation’ appeared at the top of a small hill. Half a beer consumed and off I went back into running, I was adequately fuelled for the next lap.
Into Taupo we ran slower than before, the TV cameras had caused us to loose almost 90% of any energy we had. But it would be worth it to be on the promotional material, right?
With the end in sight it was time to give the town a bit of a show. Past the yacht club for the final time I disturbed their peace and quiet with a ‘ogi ogi ogi’ and boy did the respond, half the tables stood up cheering.
One more push. The Unofficial Aid station reappeared with 5km to go. Let’s give these boys what they want. A twisty Speights was handed to me, one of New Zealand’s many attempts at a beer. Two attempts and the beer was consumed. The table got flipped, the boys spraying pints everywhere. I was their hero.
Coming into Taupo for the final time, we picked up the pace and pushed each other to the line. And in the distance I saw Sam arms stretched out, a beer in each hand.
I took the can.
I slowed to a walk as I hit the red carpet.
I removed my left shoe arms out stretched I got the crowed to cheer.
Announcer called out, ‘ARE WE GOING TO SEE A SHOEY!’.
Beer open, poured into the shoe and then for a refreshing beverage.
A little tribute to my coach. Who will be taking me back under his wing in April.
That was the run, more of a bit of fun to close off a race I’ve wanted to do for 3 years. The aim was always to enjoy myself and I think I definitely did that. Thank you so so much to all of those who have made my time in New Zealand an absolute ball all those runs and bike around Ashburton were great fun!
Also a huge thank you to my Aunt and Uncle for putting up with me for the last few months and humouring my appetite every evening! Huge thanks to my cousin Sam who has driven me up from the South Island and run around for me over the past few days.